The revolution will probably be in french.
One year for going from zero to francophone on one page - in three parts because when learning french it’s best to know from the beginning that there are many ways to create an exception. Part III.
This is how you make it
3+ MONTHS
b1 - b2
During this phase you’re going to realize you increasingly understand more. At first it will be when people articulate well. In the previous phase when people spoke simply and slowly you could understand; you’re going to grow significantly from here. People are going to start speaking faster and faster and by the end of a year following this path you’ll understand most of this. I usually grasp 90% at native speed. Miraculously even within a small group of people I know well (thank you horrible reality television). But not with people with heavy accents or those that mumble or speak really quietly.
If a larger group of french friends or families are speaking however - which is always quick and they always have more context - I’m pretty well screwed.
But that’s fixable with time. How do you get here? You remind yourself again that children listen to thousands of conversations across many formats and channels and don’t start speaking much for two years before then spending a few years developing conversation-like skills. We’re doing it in a very compressed timeframe because we also want adult vocabulary.
Secondly, you increase your time spent speaking and you watch increasingly more complex things (whether dynamic conversations, slang or difficult topics). You’re also going to learn some annoying new concepts just by noticing them and integrating them seamlessly because your head isn’t having to focus on understanding every concept. Look at this exchange by way of example:
T’as goûté la bière ? (Did you taste the beer?)
Oui, je l'ai bue et j'ai aimé ça ! (Yup, drunk it and liked it!).
Why is there an e on the end of the past participle of bu even though gender accordance only runs with être and not with avoir? It’s because la biere is feminine and it’s the direct object before avoir. When the reference is before the avoir it requires gender accordance.
Things like this don’t change anything in your speaking (mostly) but you start to notice and embed them when reading and writing. This phase remains frustrating but it’s also liberating. You find your voice and new oddities become less frustrating. Also welcome to a whole new world of wonderful expressions.
Repeat this endlessly to yourself. Language is repetition. Once you say something hundreds of times it sounds ‘right’ and requires no effort to conjure it up or understand it. The wrong way of saying it sounds wrong even if you can no longer explain why. We say many of the same things over and over. We become sensitive to language when we endlessly listen to it. Ensure you are corrected. You were likely constantly nudged as a toddler, had papers edited until the end of your school days as an adolescent, and probably find yourself editing your own writing during work or hobbies now; all are big factors in improving our language skills. As you integrate the language, you can be more creative. Or don’t be; how you want to master or bend a language is entirely up to you.
I have words that suddenly flip out of my mouth in a different language no matter which I'm speaking. I can't control it but my brain usually catches it (one second too late!) and my mouth has already engaged to switch the word over. I don't know why this happens but if that's you too - or you get stuck searching for a word you can only find in one language even when it's not your native one - don't worry about this at all. It happens!
Remember that it’s fine to get things wrong. You do in your own language too; it’s totally normal. I hear payer en carte (it should be par carte) and en vélo (it's à velo) all the time. Nobody cares. Talk. Read. Be corrected and naturally acquire tweaks to your structure, prepositions, genders, new words and new expressions.
Read more books
Reading more will really help you with fluency across speaking, writing, and listening. Using the trick to read along with the audio will imprint it into your brain until eventually it just starts to sound wrong otherwise. And you'll pick up pronunciation naturally this way and correct yourself. That’s when you know you’ve mastered it. You know when somebody who isn’t a completely fluent speaker of your language says something not quite right? You just naturally know it’s not right even though you couldn't explain why. That’s what you’ll get to with this too.
It just feels slightly odd when somebody says je veux que tu fais rather than je veux que tu fasse. It doesn’t make you any less understood. Everybody will understand and we’re always going to screw this up a bit (native speakers do too they have decades on us learning their language) but after a while all the common scenarios will start to sound right or wrong. If you don't read books grab magazines. Read blogs. The french are also incredible at comics (BD); find those. These also exist heavily on Instagram too.
Watch more youtube
Keep watching the series I recommended in the previous stage if you enjoy them as you want to get to a point where you can understand 95% of everything at normal speed. You likely won’t have reached that level on those unless you’re in full immersion, so keep going. These series here further increase the complexity. If you understand the below near perfectly without subtitles (unless you need them for hearing) then you’ve reached very fluent listening skills. Don’t expect to understand all these within a year. I still don’t and I have decent french conversations for hours. These are things the french watch so you’re getting a good exposure to cultural topics and jokes too. Find channels for your target country if it’s not France. At the time of writing these youtubers weren't in trouble as far as I'm aware but well known creators keep being found for being rather terrible with women so keep an eye out.
Need a quickie?
Likely not the french stories we've all been told about… but try one of these two. Bref is on Youtube, Peps on Netflix depending on where you are. They’re fast, culturally relevant and full of slang. It's very difficult so slow them down and rewatch. They're also perfect for dictation - write what you heard and then slowly rewatch it and try again over and over. Bon courage !
Binge more
I personally detest most reality television but it is a lifesaver for language learning! It's filled with multiple conversations in every day language, thrown at everyone. Indulge! Outside of those, here are native French speaking series I recommend trying. It is totally normal not to understand them. They’re incredibly useful to start watching and re-watching though. Use the techniques I outlined in the previous levels. Importantly just play these and podcasts whenever you’re doing anything that doesn’t require your full concentration on the activity.
...and more ‘grammers
Bonus
Subjonctif your behind
You could probably avoid using the subjunctive forever but listening-wise you’re going to need to know it anyway and you’ll read it. Et puis, once you’ve embedded it you will find yourself using it. It’s actually quite simple once you can conjugate the exceptions you use most of the time. It’s more that you won’t get it 100% correct in usage. Sometimes you’ll miss it when it should be there and other times you’ll add it when it shouldn’t be. Once you start watching some trashy series you’ll notice even some french folks don’t use it correctly all the time in tricky scenarios or when it’s slipped their mind.
Also there are just some expressions it exists in that you’ll be like what-the-fuck... but they are rare. For example to say who would have thought or who would have believed it you say: qui l’eût cru. That’s horrible because you might expect it to be qui l’auras cru. Instead it uses the subjunctive in the plus-que-parfait tense. Ouch. But this is not common so outside of expressions you learn as you go, just worry about using it for the present.
My advice is to start using it slowly. If you already have this similarly in your own language you’ll be mostly fine but for the rest of us, we can ease in with the il faut que (when you want to say something needs to - or must - be done). The que is the tip-off. For example il faut que j’aille aux toilettes (I need to go to the toilet in the same sense as I’m busting to go to the toilet). Je veux que tu fasse ça and c’est pour qu’il puisse le faire might be next.
Autocorrect Machine
By this point you should be becoming a self autocorrecting machine. This has already likely started happening in the previous phase but if it hasn’t pay attention. Your brain needs to be picking yourself up when you say the wrong thing. When you notice you said the wrong thing, correct yourself aloud. It helps to practice and remember it. Try also just slowing down when you speak; don’t worry about whether it’s annoying for the other person - you’re learning a language. Slowing day will allow you to construct more correctly and let you interject yourself naturally as you speak to correct words. Pay attention when others correct you and say it back - this helps enormously. The french fucking love correcting people on their language. It’s oddly rude but thank them - it’s quite helpful for us!
Dictating bastard
Some French folks told me that when they were at school they would do dictation exercises called dictées. Honestly, this is rather difficult up until this phase but it’s extremely effective at this stage. You can do it by listening to a podcast (with an accurate transcript available) or a series (with accurate subtitles that match the spoken word). Play one sentence (or a section) and type the words you hear before checking them; amazing for comprehension and spelling. You can also find exercises on youtube if you search for them. Speechling is a great app for with sentences that automates the review process for you. You can also look at Learn to French’s resources and start scribbling away.
Slang
All languages use slang (I think) but French really is absolutely full d’argot in casual conversation. There’s a slang word for a car, a book and your nose. Because of how often I heard langage courant or familier or verlan I decided to just learn it whenever I encountered it. This has infinitely helped my natural understanding of daily conversations along with watching series. Start with this list of common ones I’ve run into (this will change by region / country). You can choose whether you use these or not in speech, but it’s likely you’re going to need to understand slang.
Un mec (homme)
Bouffer (manger)
Draguer (séduire)
Le flic (policier)
Piquer (voler)
Le bouquin (livre)
La meuf (femme)
La bagnole (voiture)
La nana (femme)
Un truc (chose)
Le gamin (enfant)
Le gosse (enfant)
Le blé (argent)
Les fringues (vêtements)
Le fric (argent)
Une friperie (thrift store)
10 balles (10 bucks)
Bosser (travailler)
Le mec (homme)
Un boulot (travail)
Le gars (homme)
Un taf (travail)
Chiant(e) (agaçant)
Une boîte (entreprise)
Bourré(e) (ivre)
Pompette (tipsy)
Balancer (jeter)
Canon (hot)
Bordel (désordre)
Fastoche (facile)
Râler (se plaindre)
Crevé(e) (épuisé)
Tise (alcool)
Relou (pénible)
Chelou (étrange)
Kiffer (aimer)
Le pif (nez)
Marrant (drôle)
Paumer (perdre)
La tronche (visage/tête)
Fauché(e) (pauvre)
Malbouffe (junk food)
Niquer (forniquer)
Un(e) frangin(e) (frère/sœur)
Vachement (vraiment)
Ken (niquer)
Le daron (papa)
Nickel (cool)
Un pote (ami(e))
Un/e cassos (deadbeat)
Le toubib (medicin)
La clope (cigarette)
Ouf (fou)
Un clebs (chien)
Les tifs (les cheveux)
Les chiottes (toilettes)
Malin (intelligent)
Connard (imbécile)
Les couilles (testicules)
La bite (pénis)
Un soutif (soutien-gorge)
Flotter (pleuvoir)
Everyday expressions
Here’s some one liners for how you might feel about this whole experience. Pick these up during shows and conversations and note them down to review once a week. I ended up with a list of 547 little turns of phrases, unexpected structures and expressions. Click here if you want to learn them all.
After all this learning you’ve probably come to the realization that as long as you understand what’s been said you can pretty much escape with using only a few words and sounds and you’ve mastered the art of french speaking. Repeat ben (bah), ben non, and voilà quoi with the right intonation and you're half way there. Add in a là and quoi at the end of appropriate phrases. Now add some body movements (a classic shoulder shrug or puff of air) and you’ll fit right in. Add enough du coup to your sentences and you will reach the summit. It’s the French way (watch this). Take note that genre is the equivalent of the like tic in english (of which I adamantly try to avoid so do as you wish in french, I'm a staggering mess of language contradictions).
French is very reliant on sounds, tone and words that add emphasis or impart meaning. So is Dutch so this feels like a return to self for me. English doesn’t have much of this so it might be something you learn and it might feel weird. Go with it. We all have slightly different personalities in each language - embrace it!
A quick note on your accent
You’re going to have an accent for a while or forever. It’s fine and it’s up to you how much you work on it. Ever heard a France native speak English with that incredibly thick accent? On s’en fout and most of us think it’s damn cute. Try as hard as you can to mimic the right sounds because there are many similar sounds so it makes life far easier for the listener to know what you’re saying, but remember that pronunciation is different to accent.
We all speak with accents. I speak with a slightly odd accent in every language now. Our countries usually have multiple accents within them. Once you’ve mastered chatting comfortably you can spend your time changing your accent as you like (voice teachers and professionals really help with this as does listening to sentences one at a time and mimicking them exactly with the right tones). Remember to keep a sheet of your difficult words and ask native speakers to review them with you regularly. But please never ever be ashamed of your accent. You’re freaking amazing.
In France people can make an annoying deal out of pretending not to understand you or legitimately not understanding because they haven't been exposed to foreigners much in country towns. Even when their own accent is one of France’s worst. It’s rude and it’s frustrating as hell. It hurts your confidence badly. But ignore this if you encounter it. This is on them not on you. And it is not the majority and certainly not the only country with this problem. I’ve heard plenty of oooh mais j’adore ton accent while I’m apologizing for it. In other french speaking countries you will likely experience more kindness and luck with this in my experience - mostly because they’re all speaking multiple languages and aren't as strict on the language of La France itself. Work on the language first to speak fluently, then on your accent if you want to.
And if someone is really annoying you just ask them to switch to speaking in your language or for an explanation on how gender accordance with les gens works. Usually shuts them right up.
New grammar and exceptions
During this phase you’re mostly focused on comprehension and speaking. It’s a huge achievement. You’ll notice a few odd things though. Once you get to the one year mark of this journey it’s likely your brain will start being able to pick things up more easily though because you’re not having to focus on understanding all the things, all the time. That’s when you can take a second look at unexpected or complicated grammar and it won’t make you cry (or maybe just less). You’ll just absorb it and move along because you can already understand quite a bit and can speak!
THE NE EXPLÉTIF
Sometimes you’ll notice an ne when you might not expect one. Like il est meilleur qu'on ne le pense. It does not change any meaning. It’s not a negation (you need a pas or plus or jamais etc for that). It’s purely there to emphasize. You’ll hear it ocassionally in sentences like the example but mostly it’s only written.
THE LONELY L
In formal writing you’ll often see qu’on written as que l’on. The french do this because it’s more elegant when reading in your head or aloud (qu’on sounds like con which is offensive). It’s weird except after one year I do it automatically now too (but not in texts). Also used to commence phrases at times.
CAUSATIVE STRUCTURE
I wrote la chaleur fondra la neige conjugating the verbe fondre. I was corrected; it’s always faire fondre when something else is doing it to the object (recipient). So la chaleur fera fondre la neige. And if you’re having something done? Je fais construire la maison. I’m having the house built.
REFLEXIVE CAUSATIVE
One thing I thought would be simple, while I was telling a story, was that I wanted to say my bike was stolen. Turns out this is je me suis fait voler mon vélo. Not what I was expecting. I got robbed. Je me suis fait cambrioler.
Welcome to the se faire causative. How would you say are you going to get your hair done? It’s tu vas te faire coiffer? I want to have my own done? Je veux me faire coiffer. How about, I want to have some clothes made? It’s, je veux faire faire des fringues. Yeah, faire faire. Take that had had. Don’t get yourselves killed? Ne pas te faire tuer.
EXCEPTIONAL ACCORDANCE
Though gender accordance as a rule only runs with être and not with avoir you’ll start to see a regular exception. When there is a direct object before the avoir you will gender and plural accord. For example, I say je suis heureuse de vous avoir rencontrées, having met a group of women.
Reflexive verbs have a similar twist. You write elle s’est maquillée tôt because the it agrees with être. Except you don’t with the reflexives se rire de and se plaire à. I don’t know why. Most french people wouldn't. Conversely, you write elle s’est maquillé les yeux because the direct object comes after the verb which means it accords with avoir instead. Don’t worry, plenty of french think twice on these, or check online and correct themselves.
Finish with some films
Curl up with your drink of choice and indulge in movie time! There are of course hundreds to choose from. Here is a sampling I enjoyed but ask everyone for their recommendations and make a list. This is also a great way to explore new genres that you might not normally watch.
FAIRE L’AMOUR
French presidents are known for their dalliances but does a partner (or three) improve your learning progress? For me, it was a hindrance at first. I met my partner shortly after starting to learn and because he spoke english we primarily communicated in english and kept falling back to it even when I was speaking french with others. I was frustrated each time I didn’t understand him (strong accent) and I often froze. It was highly uncomfortable for my ego, to sound like a toddler with this intelligent, well spoken man. Near the one year mark, we switched to exclusively french to get over the barrier, which means I spend the majority of my speaking time in french and having my prepositions and genders fixed whilst being exposed to many new expressions. I speak with all my errors and he kindly puts up with it especially when it's obvious it's hard. It is not easy letting your partner struggle to express their thoughts on complex topics or during debates while having to repeat things so I am extremely grateful for this. Some people find this much easier, others much harder. I found it necessary to switch 100% but others recommend starting with routines such as during dinner. Ask for what you need and try different methods. All in all for your french… the less they speak any of your languages, the better. There's also something beautifully intimate in learning a language with your partner's help. Hopefully one day they'll watch you fluently speak some beautiful paragraphs and be proud of both your efforts and think; damn I helped them do that.
COMPREHENSION TIP
If you’re starting to struggle with fast, native french (and this is very normal) pick something you enjoy watching. You need to cut it every sentence or two. Watch that slice without subtitles. 2 or 3 times. Write down what you think was said. Watch it again with accurate subtitles or the transcript. Compare it to what you wrote. What did you miss? Watch it again with audio + text. Slow it down if you need to figure out what you’re not understanding and read along with it. Then when you do, watch just the audio twice more. Rinse and repeat for a new slice. Really want to frustrate yourself? Watch this video. It’s a cult hit with the french. Use this text to work your way through it. Also pieces like this can be fun to bring to iTalki sessions if you want reviews and conversation starters.
GENDER INCLUSIVITY
I can't advise on this much as french itself hasn't landed clearly with this yet. I’ve asked multiple frenchies for ways to handle it and it’s complicated. Everything is impacted by gender in the romance languages. In writing you’ll often see things like vendeur.euse to denote inclusivity but this is only inclusive of two genders on appearance. The gender neutral pronoun is iel but you’ll rarely hear it. France, like nearly every country, is sexist and patriarchal. L’Académie Française has always been majority male. This is an active debate and really complex when it changes so many words and constructions. There are many advocate communities to participate in and find your voice. If you identify as a gender outside the binary, I recommend finding teachers and groups who can help you with how to express yourself fully and comfortably as you learn.
What does this get you?
Looking back on one year is wild. In a dream world I would be comfortably fluent but I’m not a genuis. With full-time work in english alongside life, friends, family, and travels I’ve managed to fo from zilch to speaking french full time at home. I understand much better than I speak. This is normal so don't stress if that's you too. I somehow stumble into weird new rules and exceptions all the time. You might be excelling at everything more than me. Or some things you’re more comfortable with than me and others you’re struggling more with. Or everything feels harder than this. This is totally normal. You’ve utterly transformed yourself and your brain in only one year. Once you reach a similar stage to the list I’ve outlined, breathe; the hardest part is over.
Where I'm currently at
Speak exclusively french at home
Can understand 90% of native speed french during daily life and conversations with friends
Understand a lot of slang easily
Rarely ever translate when listening - there's no time in natural speed nor does my brain need to much of the time
Everyday conversations I speak without translating from one language into french
Never practice what to say before going out
All the grammar I learned in those first few months seems completely normal to me now (even though I still constantly catch myself saying the wrong thing)
Genuinely enjoy reading french books and can do so at a fairly natural pace
Confident I can express whatever I want to in a variety of ways and appointments don’t stress me
I'd be comfortable working exclusively in french if it wasn't for my job having a lot of writing involved
Watch most series and films without french subtitles and understand 60 to 100% depending on the show and genuinely enjoy them now (the not-stupid ones!)
Comfortable (though not feeling like myself with the initial chit-chat) kicking off conversations with people I know and chatting for a couple of hours
Lack of articulation is becoming easier to comprehend (but this means I still only understand 50% of my partner's Dad which is the pinnacle of french language complexity!)
Text with friends in french and refer to apps less for correction (but I text very slowly and with more effort when over a sentence or two)
Enjoy watching youtube review of photography gear from french creators; less bias, more calm (recommend finding these creators for your hobbies)
Slowly starting to make jokes, understand jokes and grab some cultural references (this the hardest thing by far so comedians can be very unfunny for a long time)
Guessing genders of nouns and switching the usage on the fly when corrected (lifelong strategy!)
I rarely remember if I heard something in french, dutch or english unless it's a specific person and they only speak one of those
What I find challenging
No way I could write all of this easily in french
Small chit-chat is still hard
I stutter and stumble over words and sentences all the damn time
Probably about one third of my prepositions are wrong when I'm chatting away
Still thinking through complex sentence structures when having to speak them so stumble through conversations
Missing a lot of vocabulary exploring new topics I’m speaking in french for the first time (you explain around it or ask for the word by describing, but you notice how many deeper words you're missing)
Strong accents and little articulation is exhausting and draining
Utterly lost in fast group conversations
Scared of starting conversations with strangers though trying
Learning approx 50 new words and 5 expressions / phrases per book at this stage
Can’t just naturally watch Friends in french and understand all of it without concentrating on the screen - this makes me sad!
Often slow at responding to texts because it requires my brain far more effort
Can’t just come into a talkshow series or conversation, listen and quickly pickup the gist (like I would do with John Oliver while cooking for example)
Can’t comfortably watch long form interviews on detailed topics and understand everything (sometimes I watch for 5 minutes and have the impression I understood all the individual words but grasped nothing)
Understand only half of sports commentary
Really hard when conversations have place names, people names and animal / plant names all of which I’m unlikely to know. Is this a word or a thing my brain asks? And very quickly I’ve lost the thread
Lots of numbers or prices in a chat mean little hope of me reiterating the exact numbers and sometimes my brain gets stuck on trying to figure them out
I rarely speak formally and my group chat is usually only in-the-moment so I struggle with conjugating vous or nous outside of the present and past when I need them
Absolutely do not use en and y consistently how they should be
What comes next?
Year two
I want to be able to write paragraphs and stories with ease and with decent confidence of the grammar. If I had to write an essay, I want to be able to do it. Essentially I’d like to fluently write in french across all the topics I regularly work in and chat about. I want to be able to speak fluently and well on those topics in life I touch in life. It will be very useful to understand most accents with 80% precision (I still struggle with Irish and Scottish and sometimes I’ll hear a regional American one and have zero idea what was said so I don't expect or need perfection). I want to comprehensively understand group conversations (though I suspect this will take longer). I’d like to make very few preposition and article mistakes. I’m going to continue with heavy (but now enjoyable) amounts of speaking, reading and listening but also mix in more dictation and vocabulary reviews . I’ll be adding in more active practice of complicated grammar also to reach a more advanced level.
As I wrap this up, it's a couple of months into Year 2 and I can already see some big changes from the list above. I promise you the hard work pays off; you just need to be consistent. I wanted to create something that might help because this takes a community. If enough people leave a little tip to let me know that it was useful, I’ll come back and add a new stage for everything that was effective in getting to the next level at the end of year two. This way I have your email to let you know when it’s live (update to arrive September / October 2024 in that case).
It's only one year; we hopefully have long lives. I always remind myself that we tend to overestimate what we can do in one year but underestimate what we can do in five.
Petit à petit, l'oiseau fait son nid.
Bon courage friend, you’ve absolutely got this.
I hope this has helped in some way. If you’ve got a question or feedback, please email me (click Credits for more information). Did you follow this process through the three stages? Let me know where it got you and how you're feeling. If you’ve found better stuff send it through too - I enjoy seeing what was useful to others or what interesting things you found. Write in french if you like :)